Ninja Cheerleaders

[Screenshot]I was pretty certain I’d already seen this movie, one night at Epsilon Theta in a double feature with But I’m a Cheerleader, and that it was awful. But actually I hadn’t! The movie I saw then was Cheerleader Ninjas. You can see how that might be confusing, so I had to watch this movie to get it straight in my mind. Cheerleader Ninjas was irredemably awful. Ninja Cheerleaders is simply very bad.

The redeeming light of this film is George Takei, who has enough of a sense of humor that he finds being in this piece of crap pretty entertaining and delivers a delightful performance. It puzzles me that Netflix’s summaries claim Tim Curry “starred” in Alice because he had about 5 minutes of screen time, and don’t even mention George Takei with reference to this film. The three ostensible leads were chosen more for visual appeal, AFAICT, than any sort of acting talent; they definitely aren’t delivering a nuanced performance (not that this is a nuanced film. The plot: bad guys kidnap George Takei, the head honcho of the ninjas’ dojo/strip club*, and steal the ninjas’ college fund. The ninjas rescue him, after cheerleading and winning a stripping contest devoid of actual stripping).

Not much to say about this film, because it’s mostly pretty awful. It doesn’t take itself too seriously, but unlike Cheerleader Ninjas doesn’t wallow in its own immaturity. It has gratuitous nudity on scene transitions, presumably for those who are disappointed that the leads don’t actually strip. I kinda could’ve done without the “scene’s over! have a random breast!” myself.

One odd side note: I am relatively certain that there was an 11th hour character/setting change in the script. The girls are cheerleaders at a well-attended basketball game, they take classes in small lectures, and they’re eagerly awaiting their acceptance into Brown. The reasonable context for all of this would be that they’re seniors in high school, but the film makes it clear they’re at a local community college (and attempting to transfer). Apparently someone involved with the film decided that high school strippers weren’t smewhere they wanted to go.

* No, really. It’s a dojo and a strip club at the same time. Would I make this up?

See also: IMDB, Wikipedia.

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About Jake
I'm a mathematics professor at the University of Louisville, and a geek.

One Response to Ninja Cheerleaders

  1. grysar says:

    Were it not for the involvement of George Takei I’d think it would be a safe bet that this review was far funnier than the film itself. With the involvement of Takei, I’d just say that it’s doubtless more efficiently funny than an 80 minute affair.

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